How your Bank Fucks You!

To fallow the lesson on interest rate this will now make a little more sense.
Your savings account, if you’re lucky, pays you 4.0% interest rate on your savings.
4.0% IS A REALLY HIGH RATE

FYI
ING Direct pays about 4.0%
WAMU pays about 0.035%

Credit Card
Your credit card charges you at the lowest regular APR about 8.77% IF YOU ARE LUCK
Usually its more like 13.99% to 19.00% or even as high as 23.00%

FYI
MBNA is about 12%
Chase is about 7.00%
Discover is about 18.99%

Now you have to ask your self, what’s a better deal???
+To hold money in a savings account and have a huge balance on your credit card?
or
+To have a smaller amount of money in the savings account and pay off the credit card and never buy anything on it ever again

AMERICA!!!!

STOP BUYING

SHIT YOU CAN'T AFFORD

Most things I write is out of shear personal experience
(correct my spelling and get mentioned in the next post :)

Calculate your Interes Rate

Shit I learn in school

[I]nterest
[P]rincipal
[r]ate
[t]ime

I = P * r * t

eg.
I= $8700.00 at 3.25% for 3 years
I= (8700.00) * (0.0325) * (3)
I= $848.25 <--- is how much you earn in interes alone.

Early adopter? Here are some of my favorite social networking apps

These are some of my favorite Web 2.0 sites, ones that I use and am a member of:

1. TheThingsIWant.com - keep track of things you want to buy, or get as gifts.
2. dodgeball - let your whole circle of friends know where you are, with just an sms
3. bloglines.com - my only regret about RSS feeds is that they are a recent phenomenon. Using software RSS readers is ok if you only have one PC - but I read my blogs at work, then in the living room, then in the home office - so syncronicity is nice. With bloglines, it knows what I've read, and what I haven't, so I am not wasting time scrolling through old posts. It's definitely nice to have control over what I read.
4. del.icio.us - keep track, tag, and share your favorite sites
5. flickr.com - now owned by Yahoo!, an excellent photo tagging and sharing site.
6. Social Voicemail - this !-happy website lets you set up an account where you call one number, leave one message, and all of your friends get it. Cheaper, faster, and easier than text messages, online bulletins, or calling everyone. Early Adopter Signup is limited to 50,000 users, and if you make it, it's free to sign up, and you get free service for life.

Sites I don't participate in:

• MySpace - I'm no longer a horny 19-year old who forgot how to use a phone
• Facebook - no longer in school

What got this post started was the news that socialvoicemail.com went live today, and is offering free accounts to the first 50,000 people. The rest of it isn't active, and could be a massive e-mail-collecting fraud, but I'll reserve judgment for later.
Also of note: IHateDRM, a website dedicated to one of my favorite pet peeves - Digital Rights Management, which takes away our right to enjoy our entertainment wherever we want it. Here's an example: most people buy a CD for $15. If you want it in MP3, and don't know how to rip, it's 99c per track. Then, if you want a ringtone, it's $1.99 for low-quality 30-second snippet of that same song. If the CD is DRM-protected, the DMCA makes it illegal to break that protection - even though fair use laws state that you can take a CD that you bought, and copy it for your own personal use. Another example is that DVDs which you buy in the US will not play in the rest of the world due to region coding (US is region 1, UK is region 2, etc.). So, if you travel overseas, don't bring your DVDs - unless you bring along your own DVD player. Ironically, in most other countries, multi-region DVD players are more prevalent than region-locked players - who in their right mind would buy a unit that only plays back that country's DVDs? I'll tell you who - the US. Good luck finding multi-region players at your local Worst Buy, Fried Circuit City, CompBadForUSA, etc. So switch to divx players, burn your own movies, get educated, and vote for politicians who aren't fooled by the lies the industry tells them.

I Found A New Job

I found this great position in the IT industry

The position pays $12 bucks an hour
They want a person part time
And its a 38.9 mile commute from where I live

Lets do the Math!!!

Part time means half as long as a regular day;
so its 8 divided by 2 = 4 hours per day. (so far with me???)
At the rate of $12 * 4 hours per day = $48 dollars per day
(not that bad for part time BS job)

Lets see:
Subtract 25% for taxes, YOU HAVE TO PAY UNCLE SAM TO SUPPORT THE WAR OTHER WISE YOUR A TERRORIST.

Mind you I really don't get didly for my 25%, its not like I get healthcare for it, and its not like this country is safe, nor do I get any privacy while I’m on my phone.

25%Tax of $48 is = $12 (that’s a quarter of what I make!!!!!!)

Oh and thanks to Uncle Sam I'm now paying $3.00 per gallon of gas.

In addition my American Car Get roughly 10MPG (miles per gallon)
[And yes its American; FORD = Fucker Only Roles Down-Hill, “FIRST ON RACE DAY” my Ass!]

At 10 MPG that means I waste 4 Gallons of gas getting to work and another 4 gallons getting home
so that’s 4 + 4 = 8 multiplied by $3.00 per gallon of gas = $24

That’s $24 bucks a day given to those DAM Saudis!!! Those Airplane Crashing Freaks

So now lets do our formula:

$48 per day - $25% Tax($12) - $24 on Gas = Gives us a grand total of $12 Per Day

Well Holly-Fucking-Shit no fucking wonder all the jobs are moving to India.
I have to spend two hours in traffic and work my ass off for $12 hours per day.

Dam it, that’s not even enough to buy rice and beans at Gelson’s to feed my “familia”

Fuck this shit.

First Things First

First Things First He Didn't Die!

I guess Dickster (chaney) is as good of a shot as he is a vice president!

Poor Poor Harry

So which one of these fine outfits was
Harry Whittington wearing when Krazy Old Dick Shot him?













Poor Harry never head a chance












I wonder what the Wal-Mart configuration looks like








Harry Ahmed Sha-Whittington
"Alalalalalalahala!"

Old Blind Dickster!

Call me “Crazy” but when I heard that old Dicky shot someone, I said “the guy is good as dead”. To my surprise the next day I heard on the news that the wounds were only superficial, and were only to his face. The first thing I thought, “This can’t be, I can’t be wrong, I’m never wrong!”
Well what a shocker, it seems now that a part of the buckshot has reached the poor mans heart and caused a heart attack.
I hate to say this, but this guy will not survive! There is a reason he got shot and its not because old Dicky is blind and didn’t see the guy in his ORANGE hunting vest! Oh and there really is a reason why they kept it under the hat for what 24, 72 hours?
This is bullshit… I hate this stupid administration, everything they stand for they have done the opposite, Republicans were supposed to be for a smaller government, instead its bigger then it has ever been, we now have more agency then ever before. Republicans are supposed to spend less and save more instead today we have the biggest deficit that the United States has ever had, we have more of a deficit then there are stars in the universe, and that’s a fact!!!

Oh, watch I’m probably going to be investigated because of this bullshit blog. Watch US is slowly turning into Communist China.

I say FUCK YOU, and guess what I’m not the only one, not by a FUCKING long shot!

A Woman is Like a Gas Tank

Some are large, and can retain up to 17.5 gallons at anyone time.

Others are whores, you constantly find yourself pumping and ramming them with the nozzle, its like the can’t get enough of it.

Others are gold-diggers, you keep putting money into them and they never seem to work.

Others are petite, economical, and all around great, but you would never let your friends see you behind the wheel of it.

Some you’ve been with since high school, you know them inside and out; They whine a lot and you know you argue all the time, but you just can’t get rid of them.

Others are handy-downs from friends; ones they have used and abused and now pass it of to you to practice on.

Some like it rough and beg to be floored and mistreated, while others stall, stator, and grumble anytime you try to leave the parking lot.

Some like it rough and don’t mind a little bump now and them, while others stator, stall, bitch and moan; and if you scratch it the doors fall off.

Happy New Year!

You know your living in 2006 when:

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 2.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of you r life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )

12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.

AND NOW U R LAUGHING at yourself.

Go on, forward this to your friends you know you want to! You know you are living in 2006

I Shot The Sheriff, But I Did Not Shoot The Deputy

I love LAPD, but I love the Sheriffs more.

A Sheriff’s officer pulled over a speeding corvette, after a short high-speed prosecute. Pulled out the passenger, told him to get on the ground, then told him to get up from the ground. As the passenger was getting up from the ground the sheriff decided to open fire. The sheriff shot the passenger 3 times, and told him to “shut the fuck up!”

I Love LA

The whole ordeal was video taped. The neighbored standing next to the guy with the camera is heard screaming at the Sheriff, “You told him to get up!”

Did I say, “I love LA”?

“I Love LA!”

Ironic Twist

The passenger that was shot was an Mexican (Air force Police Officer, just got back from Iraq). The Sheriff’s Officer that shot him…… BLACK!!! (African American) (I love it)

For once no one can say that all of police shootings are racially motivated. The new theory will be, that they are all just fucking nuts!

Today the victim was visited in the hospital by no one other then
“Rodney; I got hit by many batons, King” Hahahahah!!!

Viva la Vita Loca

My Crazy Life Dos Stylz!

T-Mobile Nickl and Dimes its Customers

T-Mobile is about to raise the rates on its text messaging service.

Initially it cost 5 cents to send a message or to receive a message. The new price is 10 cents.
Yes it sounds like pidgins feed but think about it this way, lets say you spend $10 dollars a month on text messaging... well the next month you'll pay $20 dollars for those same messages.
Yea a nickel to a dime is not a lot, nut it is double.

In addition the 411 services will still cost $1.49 however it now includes your airtime.
(Every time you call 411 its 1.49 plus airtime)

World Wide Internet TV

Great little site, lets you brows countries and their relative TV stations.
Unfortunately US stations are limited, there are almost no Network Channels, most US channels are Christian Brain Washing Shit Channels. Stick to Arab TV, more factual then the Christian Shit.

51 lines likely to get you a slap!

1/ Your name must be Daisy because I have the incredible urge to plant you right here.
2/ Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, lets go screw.
3/ Just call me milk, I'll do your body good.
4/ Your body's name must be Visa, 'cause it's everywhere I want to be.
5/ Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
6/ I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your Bed Rock
7/ I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
8/ My love for you is like the Energizer bunny: It keeps going and going............
9/ That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.
10/ I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.
11/ Do you want to get drunk and f**k, or don't you drink?
12/ I enjoy doing maintenance, you look like someone I would like to "tinker" with.
13/ You must be from Pearl Harbor, 'cause Baby you're the Bomb-diggity.
14/ If you were a new hamburger at McDonalds's, you would be McGorgeous.
15/ Is that Windex? Because I can see myself in your pants.
16/ I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?
17/ I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Kmart so I could ride you all day long for a dollar.
18/ Wanna play House? You be the screen door and I'll slam you all night long.
19/ If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.
20/ Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille nametag.
21/ If you were a car, I'd wax you and ride you all over town.
22/ Guy: "Would you like to dance?"
Girl: "I would love to dance but I wouldn't dance with you"
Guy: "I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in those pants."
23/ Excuse me, do you have your phone number, I seem to have lost mine.
24/ I'd look good on you.
25/ I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house.
26/ If you left leg was Christmas and your right leg Easter, can I visit you between the Holidays?
27/ You look like a girl that's heard every line in the book, so what's one more going to hurt?
28/ F**k me if I'm wrong, but is your name Yolanda?
29/ I'd love every bone in your body, especially mine.
30/ Excuse me, do you wanna f**k or should I apologise?
31/ You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
32/ Do you want to dance? No? Well I guess a f**k is out of the question.
33/ Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?
34/ I've lost my bed, can I borrow yours?
35/ You must be Jamaican, 'cause Jamaican me crazy.
36/ My recipe for love is one cup of you, one cup of me, knead until hard and serve hot.
37/ Are your legs tired, because you've been running through my mind all day long.
38/ You be the tree, and I'll wrap you like a Koala.
39/ Hey Baby, I'm like American Express, you don't want to leave home without me.
40/ Do you have a quarter? My mother told me to call home when I met the girl of my dreams.
41/ The word for the night is "legs". Lets go back to my place and spread the word.
42/ Hey Baby, what's your sign? Caution, Slippery When Wet, Dangerous Curves Ahead?
43/ Hi my name is Jamie, remember it, 'cause you'll be screaming it all night long.
44/ I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
45/ Was your Dad a farmer? 'Cause you sure have great melons.
46/ Want to play Conductor? You be the Engineer, and I'll go Choo Choo.
47/ You must be Jelly, 'cause Jam don't shake like that.
48/ Guy: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" Girl: "Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore."
49/ Hi my name is Skippy, like Peanut Butter, I stick to the roof of your mouth.
50/ Hi, my name is Pogo, want to jump on my stick?
51/ The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue

The Deal With The Devil

Can you imagine graduating out of Yale with a C average. Dodging the draft to Vietnam. Getting elected president, even though the votes didn’t add-up. Choking on a pretzel, in the oval office, loosing consciousness, hitting your head on the coffee table on your way down. And most recently having a live grenade, wrapped in a handkerchief, thrown at you while giving a speech in Georgia, and not having it go off.

WHAT DEAL DO YOU HAVE WITH THE ANGEL OF DEATH???

You are the anti-Christ
Everyone hates you (Most of the world hates you)
We can’t wait until you are gone (out of office)
You are stupid
You can’t read!
You can’t speak!
Your “daddy” bought you into office
Once your “daddy” passes (because he is old), all of your, so-called,
friends will turn on you

WE HATE YOU!!!

Don't Fuck Bush, Just Sue Him

Iyman Faris, the only named American target of the National Security Agency's secret warrantless wiretap program, will consider a lawsuit against the president of the United States, according to his criminal defense attorney, David Smith.

"I am sure he would be delighted to sue President Bush," said Smith, of the law firm English & Smith in Alexandria, Va., who is representing Faris in his criminal appeals. "He may be the only person in the country who can."

To accomplish this goal, Smith has issued an all points bulletin for civil liberties attorneys and constitutional scholars interested in taking up his client's case. "If some lawyer would like to sue on behalf of Faris, I would be happy to introduce them," Smith told Salon Thursday evening. "I've got the man here."

"If I could sue the mother fucker (Bush), I'd be smilig too!"

Mercedes Benz - now 25% less gadgety!

Are you one of those Benz fans who goes ga-ga over all of the tri-star's bells and whistles? As a former owner of a late-80's 560SEL with a reclining back seat, I was one of those people. When you shop for a car, is the ability to open the door without using the key high on your list of considerations? You may want to re-think that S-class purchase. Why? DaimlerChrysler brass issued an edict last year, directed at the engineers and suppliers behind the increasingly compex MB electronic systems. Did you know the Maybach has 77 electronic control units? When those units fail, you either lose your seat position, or your drive-by-wire brakes. Something to think about. Unfortunately, elecronic control systems are a fact of life for most of cars. At least DCX is doing something about it, by testing their systems as part of an integrated test unit, as well as individually. They are also forcing their suppliers to become certified, and joining other carmakers in adopting standards for the various vehicle control systems.
What DCX seems to have forgotten is that one of the reasons MB cars fetch their ridiculous prices, in addition to paying for heritage, design, perceived safety, societal ranking, and teutonic genes, the buyers are paying for, and expecting, a growing cadre of gizmos and gadgets that make you go "wow!" Seat memory: check. Keyless/buttonless entry: check. HID lights: check. LCD speedometer that converts into rear-view/front radar view: check (see 2006 s-class). Anti-booming sunroof setting: not anymore.
The following is an excerpt from DaimlerChrysler's The Zero-Defect Initiative - Sounding Out Hardware and Software:

Increasingly faster chips that offer more memory capacity - and at lower costs - make it possible to equip existing electronic components with more and more functions. But new functions make testing more expensive and systems integration more difficult. What’s more, many users will find they can not operate a device that’s overloaded with all conceivable functionsuntil after they have pored through thick user manuals.
Wolfsried adopts a clear-cut position on this matter: “Functions that no one uses and that are of no use to anyone do not belong in the car.” He and his team found “bells and whistles” of this kind at the Mercedes-Benz Car Group as well. “That’s why we removed more than 600 functions from our cars.”
As examples, he cites an “anti-booming setting” on the sunroof for highway driving, or the storage of a driver’s individual seat position in the car key. “It was done with good intentions, but if I take my wife’s key at some point and can’t find my own seat position any more, that tends to be annoying for me instead of comfortable.”

So instead of investing money into better UI
(see Nokia, Apple, Audi, Frog Design, et al), the decision is to cut "more than 600 functions from our cars." Imagine paying $50,000 per year of MIT tuition, and finding that English classes have been eliminated to save money and to reduce the complexity of the admissions office database. So next time you are in the market for a new car, just remember who gives you all of your bells and whistles (Audi, BMW, Lexus), and who takes them away to cut corners.

Maybach Exelero Concept>

The worst poem in the universe

The dead swans lay in the stagnant pool.
They lay. They rotted. They turned
Around occasionally.
Bits of flesh dropped off them from
Time to time.
And sank into the pool's mire.
They also smelt a great deal.  

-Paul Neil Milne Johnstone

Bad Santa!

Images from Snopes.com article "Santa Slay"

A gutted Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

A blood-spattered, knife-wielding Santa Claus figure
holding a bloody severed head outside a Manhattan brownstone

A lynched Santa Claus

Child bawling upon encountering a grave with a headstone
indicating that Santa Claus had died earlier in the year
(in case you can't tell, it's a composite image)

Screw You Susteen (makers of Data Pilot)

I sent the following message to Susteen when they sent me yet another ad for a company that has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with Susteen or its customers:

I will NEVER EVER AGAIN purchase any of your products. I made the mistake of investing in your universal kit. When I got a defective cable in the package, it took me a week of calling to get it exchanged. As soon as I switched phones, and tried to use your product for the purpose I bought it for - to upload my phone book to my new phone - I could not do so, because a year had passed since I bought your kit, and my new phone was not supported since I could not update the software. If your idea of good customer relations is to force them to keep on paying for updates and cables that don't work with the universal kits that you sell, then your management needs to go back to school. You've lost a customer in me and my whole family, and I've convinced at least ten of my friends who were thinking of purchasing these kits to buy FutureDial instead. Good bye, and good riddance!